The way of the happy, healthy woman.

A fitness instructor, one whom I respect, one whom has energising, feel good workouts, wrote a post about the ways of skinny women.

I felt disappointed. Betrayed even.

When will we stop categorising people, and most especially women, according to their weight?

Since when is skinny a compliment, a goal to which to aspire?

I’ve had eating disorders. I’ve been thin, very thin, but never thin enough to please the significant others in my life.

I’ve had exercise addictions.

I’ve been a “normal” weight.

I’ve been obese.

I am “overweight”.

But I am no longer obsessed about weight and appearance. I am no longer cold and tired and achey all the time, in retrospect the side effects for me of dieting and exercising to maintain a “good” weight. My health and blood tests are good. I’m healthy. And I am no longer willing to maintain the level of obsession needed for me to have a certain look. For there was a level of obsession. And now I have other things to think about, other dreams to follow.

I take care of myself, or at least I aim to. I aim to look like me, a good enough me. I aim to be heathy and happy. I love working out, for my health, for my “me” time, for fun, as a challenge. I aim to spend time on my looks but more time on who I am, on prayers, in using my mind, on my vocation, my work, on others, on my dreams, on the me that is more than weight and looks.

I think I can be me and still look good.

And so do “Intuitive Eating”, “The Rules of Normal Eating”, “Beyond Chocolate”, “Nice Girls Finish Fat”. (You can find those books on Amazon or Kindle or the groups on Facebook.)

It’s the way of the happy, healthy woman.

5 thoughts on “The way of the happy, healthy woman.”

  1. Well said, Leonie!

    It’s amazing how many thoughts are consumed by weight. It’s an issue that can creep in and take up residence at the back of our minds. I try not to mention weight with my own girls because I know how comments can affect how we see ourselves, and that affects how we feel. My grandmother was always good at pointing out any excess weight I was carrying! I grew up in a family of ‘small’ people and it would have been unthinkable and unforgiveable to have become a bigger person. What pressure!

    Like you, I love to keep active. There is nothing that makes me feel so good as challenging my body to a good run. But I don’t associate exercise with maintaining or losing weight. I enjoy doing it!

  2. Hi Leonie, I don’t know how well you’ll remember me – we met in Adelaide about ten years ago.

    I loved what you wrote here, because although I’m not much into exercise per se, I do want to maintain a reasonable level of health and I do know that I should exercise more, eat better etc. Your thoughts here are great! Personally, unless they are made that way, I don’t believe women should ever aspire to be skinny. Healthy? Sure, why not? But not skinny, unless that’s their natural shape.

    But I’m also after some specific advice about education. Did your sons attend university and did they go there after being home schooled or did they do year 11 and 12 somewhere? My eldest child started year 11 in February, but then we moved to the USA! So, now I can’t send her to high school here (not that I really want to) but I’m unsure how to best proceed. Any advice?

    God bless you!


  3. Hi Louise! My kids have all gone onto university after homeschooling. They started Open University courses in what would have been their year eleven or year twelve years and used these to apply on campus .

    1. Thanks for that, Leonie! I thought I would try that method, so I’m glad it worked for your boys. How many subjects did they need to do with Open University?

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